How To Be A Great Bridesmaid

If you have the wonderful job of being a Bridesmaid  then read on…

Being asked to be a Bridesmaid is a great honour and can be great fun. For some this can also be a bit nerve wracking, so we’ve compiled some ideas in our blog to help you know exactly what you have said yes to and how to make sure that you help everything run smoothly from the outset. What follows may well apply to you whether you are one of several Bridesmaids or the Chief Bridesmaid.

Ask the Bride to be what she wants from you.

A great start to being a great Bridesmaid is to ask the future Bride what she actually wants from you and what her expectations are. With such a variety of styles of wedding, budgets and personalities, what the Bride requires or wants can vary immensely, so don’t make too many assumptions about what may be required from you.

Talk about the Wedding

The best way to understand what the Bride to be (and maybe the Chief Bridesmaid) want from you is to have an initial open conversation.

Following on from this chat remember that you will be a sounding board not just for ideas, but also to help the Bride to be with any nerves or worries about wedding preparations and the big day itself. Part of your job will be to empathise or sometimes just to listen her and be a friend.

Remember if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all and if you have reservations over the Brides ideas or opinions speak in a thoughtful and positive manner.

Try not to argue with the other Bridesmaids.

There are bound to be a few stressful moments in preparations for the big day and on the big day itself. There is a lot to organise and it’s not possible for everyone to agree on everything all the time. However you need to bear in mind that your job is to make everything less stressful for the bride so don’t get too preoccupied with getting your own way!

Be prepared for some give and take, this is not a competition and teamwork is essential to make everything run smoothly.

The Hen Party

We all have a stereotype idea of the Hen Party (often involving copious amounts of alcohol and a limousine) but bear in mind what the Bride to be would actually like to do. The Hen Party will no doubt be a topic of conversation both before and after the wedding so why not plan something memorable?

These days there are a whole host of experiences available for groups from the more laid back spa days offered by many venues to trampolining parks, zombie escape rooms and even segway polo for the more adventurous amongst you. The website Go Hen has some fab ideas if the Bride to be leans towards the adventurous side of life.

Just make sure that the Bride to be has fun as she may well take the hen do as a signal towards how smoothly the big day will go and how you and the other Bridesmaids will act on the day with your responsibilities.

Be nice about the dress.

Even if the dress isn’t exactly fitting with your sense of style, by agreeing to be a Bridesmaid you have agreed to wear the dress.

It’s difficult to pick out a dress that will look good on everybody so there has to be a compromise. It’s only one day and night of your life so make sure you compliment whatever dress you are wearing with your best smile.

Don’t feel you have to spend a fortune on your responsibilities.

If you are helping put together decorations or party favours you don’t need to spend a fortune on these yourself. Imagination goes a long way and it will mean more to the Bride if what you’ve made or ordered is personal to her rather than spending a lot of money on something more general.  If you want inspiration for this check out some of the great ideas on Pinterest. Why not visit the White Hart’s Pinterest boards for a little inspiration?

Also make sure you leave enough time if you want to provide something a little different, since it may take some time to order or to make!

Do not drink too much on the big day.

This sounds very obvious but with alcohol freely available, it’s very easy to drink more than you were planning to. No one will be grateful if you have acted in a way that embarrasses anybody at the wedding, or created a bad memory that will stick with the Bride or Groom and their families.

Friends can fall out over much less important events than a wedding so have a good time but remember it’s a long day and part of your job is to be charming and to help organise the day, neither of which you will be able to do as well if you’ve had a glass too many!

Have your Emergency bag ready.

There can always be a few slip ups on the big day so it’s a good idea to have an emergency bag ready with the following: Deodorant, mints, bobby pins, fashion tape, tissues, sewing kit, hair spray, and a bottle of water. Obviously you know the Bride so feel free to add (or subtract items from this list).

Being a Bridesmaid is a great honour and there is of course a level of pressure on you to perform your duties. However if you get it right you have helped create a wonderful day for a friend and hopefully have been an important part of good memories that will last a lifetime.


If you are planning a wedding in Essex then why not talk to us at the White Hart Wedding Venue and we can help with your wedding planning and hopefully give you good ideas and advice for the big day. Call the White Hart on 01787 237 250 or email us.