How To Be A Great Groom

Want to be the best groom ever?

Being a groom has many pressures and responsibilities, however your wedding itself can be a great fun day providing it has been planned well. Brides-to-be are typically the ones to take on most of the wedding planning and whilst this may still be the case, planning has become increasingly shared as with many other traditional gender roles in modern life.

Recent surveys suggest that planning a wedding is more stressful as an experience for men than women and so with this in mind following are tips for you if you are currently planning your wedding. Remember each wedding is as unique as the couple getting married – speak to your partner about she expects and wants from you and what you expect from her.

Don’t forget that at The White Hart we’ve helped many couples plan their big day. Why not call us on 01787 237 250 and ask to speak to our wedding organiser Laura. We can help with suggestions towards what you can do with your available budget and also have many reliable wedding suppliers we deal with regularly we can recommend.

1. Get Involved

You should offer to get involved from the start. There are many aspects you should be involved with in the early stages of the planning including the date of wedding, the budget, ceremony details, the guest list, the venue (obviously for a great wedding you will choose our venue The White Hart!!) and accommodation for your guests. These are the key decisions that can cause a lot of stress without having discussed them adequately.

Whilst traditionally the day is all about the Bride, if you are involved in planning and using your imagination, you are more likely to have a great wedding day and your enthusiasm for the wedding should come across to your bride to be.

Offer to help to arrange appointments with vendors and suppliers (or speak to us about this). If your bride to be has a Pinterest board (or something similar) take a look to get an idea of what she likes before you start making calls and decisions. You can also talk to her close friends if you want any extra advice about how to help – a candid response can prove useful with regard to your initial decision making.

There are often quite a few mundane jobs (like stuffing invites in envelopes or compiling the responses to these), so don’t shy away from any of these tasks – your help will be noted and appreciated.

2. Time Flies

Bear in mind that the big day will come sooner than you think. For example make sure that you leave enough time for getting tuxes fitted (particularly if any of the groomsmen aren’t in the same town as you). A wedding can be quite stressful anyway so don’t leave anything to the last minute. This also means you can focus more time on your bride to bee as you are closing in on the date. This kind of support will go a long way so bear it in mind from the start of planning your wedding.

3. No Ex Girlfriends

NO. Don’t even ask unless the ex happens to be a best friend of your future wife (and yes that stuff does happen sometimes in life although let’s face it, it’s pretty rare).

4. Romance

Plan a surprise or two on the wedding day. Maybe arrange with the chief bridesmaid to give her a love poem from you whilst she is preparing for the big day (perhaps before she has had her make up done if it’s going to be emotional!!)

You can always leave a nice present underneath the bridal suite pillow (obviously nothing that’s too easily squashed!!).

Surprises don’t need to be expensive. It’s truly the thought that counts.

5. Be Supportive

Whilst any groom to be will have realised that there is always an element of stress on the big day bear in mind that many women have thought about this day all their lives.

If things aren’t perfect remind her that the day is also about the rest of your lives together. If a few details aren’t exactly as you or she wanted them it doesn’t need to detract from the whole day’s success.

6. The Wedding Night

Bear in mind that many couples do not end up having sex on their wedding night. This is actually quite normal after weeks of planning and rushing around and the emotional impact of the day. You and your wife may well be exhausted so don’t feel this reflects anything about the change of status in your relationship.

According to Bluebella’s survey in 2016 just over half of all newly married couples don’t have sex that night. The main cited reason for women was exhaustion and for men?

You guessed it. Being too drunk.

This is no indication of the rest of your life. If you can arrange a late checkout then enjoy the morning after instead.

7. The Honeymoon

Plan this together to make sure you both have a great time. If you enjoy different pursuits in your leisure time then try heading to a location where you both enjoy yourselves. Wherever you’ve picked, research it well before booking. There are some great packages for a variety of budgets at if you feel you need a little inspiration.

8. Enjoy The Day

Yup that bit.

If you are planning your Essex Wedding then speak to the White Hart and let us help make your big day one that you will cherish.